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Stage-Fright!
How was your Christmas? Mine was ace, except that I don’t think I’ve been this stressed for a long while. The day job has been keeping me more than busy, so I’ve not been around much.
The only extra-curricular thing I have really had time to do was the play I was in last week. Not a proper play – a ‘mummer’s play which the people from Raising the Arwen were doing for the Bardic Feast to mark the solstice. I had to play a witch-doctor-type character called Jack Finney who brings the king back to life. It was all great fun, quite chaotic though.
There was one bad thing – I managed to get stage fright. Proper stage fright. I have had this once before, years ago – it’s a bit like having a panic attack, but you’re on stage. Luckily, I managed to mask it quite well, I thought. Also, I didn’t lose my sight this time, which is what happened last time, with everything shrinking to a little tunnel as I was trying to read poems from the page (good job I more or less knew them)! Stopped as soon as I sat down, of course.
It’s very difficult to tell when you are going to start feeling bad on stage, because the adrenalin is going and you feel tense and sick and excited and all kinds of things normally. It’s not until your ankles start to go that you realise your mind no longer has total control over your body; this is quite scary, which makes you feel even worse.
I think though, that I am as prone to such things as most people, or most likely less, so it’s certainly nothing to fret about. And the evening went pretty well in the end, so that was all to the good.
Just to be sure though, I took Christmas off. Sorry about that, but I’ve been relaxing with my family, away from the interwebs and things. And N has been looking after me, making me fat with pies and chocolates and being lovely. Back to the grindstone from today though – got lots of stuff to sort out. Watch this space!
The only extra-curricular thing I have really had time to do was the play I was in last week. Not a proper play – a ‘mummer’s play which the people from Raising the Arwen were doing for the Bardic Feast to mark the solstice. I had to play a witch-doctor-type character called Jack Finney who brings the king back to life. It was all great fun, quite chaotic though.
There was one bad thing – I managed to get stage fright. Proper stage fright. I have had this once before, years ago – it’s a bit like having a panic attack, but you’re on stage. Luckily, I managed to mask it quite well, I thought. Also, I didn’t lose my sight this time, which is what happened last time, with everything shrinking to a little tunnel as I was trying to read poems from the page (good job I more or less knew them)! Stopped as soon as I sat down, of course.
It’s very difficult to tell when you are going to start feeling bad on stage, because the adrenalin is going and you feel tense and sick and excited and all kinds of things normally. It’s not until your ankles start to go that you realise your mind no longer has total control over your body; this is quite scary, which makes you feel even worse.
I think though, that I am as prone to such things as most people, or most likely less, so it’s certainly nothing to fret about. And the evening went pretty well in the end, so that was all to the good.
Just to be sure though, I took Christmas off. Sorry about that, but I’ve been relaxing with my family, away from the interwebs and things. And N has been looking after me, making me fat with pies and chocolates and being lovely. Back to the grindstone from today though – got lots of stuff to sort out. Watch this space!